No intention of kiboshing, sir. Just very, very curious to see how you'd defend the film - and if you couldn't, no problem! Your film reviews are best at their most savage.
I mean, seriously - my wife loves Abba as much as anyone, but she said listening to Pierce Brosnan sing ought to be footnoted in the Geneva Conventions as a crime against humanity.
"The legal definition of torture has been much aired in recent years, and I take “Mamma Mia!” to be a useful contribution to that debate. In a way, the whole film is a startling twist on the black art of rendition: ordinary citizens, often unaware of their own guilt, are spirited off to a secure environment in Eastern Europe, there to be forced into a humiliating and often painful confession of sins past. “I tried to reach for you, but you have closed your mind,” in the bitter words of Sam. I thought that Pierce Brosnan had been dragged to the edge of endurance by North Korean sadists in his final Bond film, “Die Another Day,” but that was a quick tickle with a feather duster compared with the agony of singing Abba’s “S.O.S.” to Meryl Streep through a kitchen window. Somebody, either a cheeky Swede or another North Korean, has deliberately scored the number a tone and a half too high, with visible results: swelling muscles along the jawline, tightened throat, a panicky bulge in the eyes. There is no delicate way of putting this, but anyone watching Brosnan in mid-delivery will conclude that he has recently suffered from a series of complex digestive problems, and that the camera has, with unfortunate timing, caught him at the exact moment when he is finally working them out. What has he done to deserve this?"
7 comments:
Fool!
I'd mock you more, but it'd feel like dancing in front of a paraplegic.
You'll never be able to top this!
thanks the kiss of death on that next post then lads!
Seriously though, that New Yorker review was just about the funniest thing I read all last year.
No intention of kiboshing, sir. Just very, very curious to see how you'd defend the film - and if you couldn't, no problem! Your film reviews are best at their most savage.
I mean, seriously - my wife loves Abba as much as anyone, but she said listening to Pierce Brosnan sing ought to be footnoted in the Geneva Conventions as a crime against humanity.
From that New Yorker review:
"The legal definition of torture has been much aired in recent years, and I take “Mamma Mia!” to be a useful contribution to that debate. In a way, the whole film is a startling twist on the black art of rendition: ordinary citizens, often unaware of their own guilt, are spirited off to a secure environment in Eastern Europe, there to be forced into a humiliating and often painful confession of sins past. “I tried to reach for you, but you have closed your mind,” in the bitter words of Sam. I thought that Pierce Brosnan had been dragged to the edge of endurance by North Korean sadists in his final Bond film, “Die Another Day,” but that was a quick tickle with a feather duster compared with the agony of singing Abba’s “S.O.S.” to Meryl Streep through a kitchen window. Somebody, either a cheeky Swede or another North Korean, has deliberately scored the number a tone and a half too high, with visible results: swelling muscles along the jawline, tightened throat, a panicky bulge in the eyes. There is no delicate way of putting this, but anyone watching Brosnan in mid-delivery will conclude that he has recently suffered from a series of complex digestive problems, and that the camera has, with unfortunate timing, caught him at the exact moment when he is finally working them out. What has he done to deserve this?"
See, and that's what I get for being too impatient to click through on links: blandly restating someone else's joke.
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