Wednesday, May 08, 2019

the Fullfillment* Centre 2


2

I remember the stairs in that flat, the carpets were dirty and when we moved in we had to clean it top to bottom.  We had been there for 18 moths and the landlady had put the place up for sale, trying to cash out we assumed, as prices were already starting to slide. We had a meeting with her to go over the property a few weeks later and despite the fact that she was around the same age I was she spoke to us angrily, was demanding, as though we were children: perhaps not children but subordinates, which I suppose we were, as tenants. In the battle to make money, especially in the battle over money from property we had been defeated and had now become a resource. Perhaps she was so hostile due to repressed guilt of some kind, knowing our life and labour went to building her and her children's comforts and assured futures at the cost of our own. But I doubt it.

More likely she viewed us as failures, below moral consideration, low-status males slipping toward our forties and fifties with the little charm we had had pretty much all used up. We were at the bottom of the pecking order.

But perhaps not that far down, really. Not compared to the person who was waiting for me on the other side of the door. The bottom was much lower than we imagined. We still had some way to go until we got there.

But we did get there.

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